"I get thousands of women speaking directly to me about how I’ve personally changed their life or altered their views in some way." I am one of them, thank you sharing again and again. sending you love, lea <3
I don't think I've ever felt so connected to someone else's experience. Your words resonate deeply with me, as I went through something very similar. From the generational trauma of a long line of young mothers to the desire to break that cycle and not pass on the pain to someone new, I understand it all. The difference is, I did go through with the abortion. Everything you described—the overwhelming guilt and relief—I felt it all too. It happened ten years ago for me, when I was 27. I don't regret the decision now; it was undoubtedly the right one. But I’d be lying if I said I never think about the unborn child. I even named it...how weird is that? Anyway, the pain you're feeling will subside with time. You're not alone in this. Thank you for sharing your story. 💜
the way i completely understood & deeply felt each emotion you wrote about in this, even if i didn’t relate to some.
as someone who has miscarried, it’s not talked about enough.
“ It felt shocking that this happens so often to women and I barely heard about it.” really spoke to me. thank you for sharing, genuinely. i’m wishing you some peace of mind, & i’m excited to see how your future unfolds.💗
I just read your substack. I had the exact same when I was 19 and in my second year at Uni. It took me right back to that. I was reading your words but seeing myself at the doctors and the hospital and on the toilet in our apartment as I miscarried and cried for the life I’d already decided wasnt going to be.
I honestly think the choice was taken from me because the universe knew it wasn’t the right time but didn’t want me to forever bear the weight of that decision. I imagine the same for you.
Mine was over 20 years ago. This next few months will be hard and tearful as your body deals with the hormones and physical loss and then your brain deals with the emotional cost. For the next few years I had a surreal kind of reaction. Not quite grief but a sad curiosity about what life would have been like. I would see children who would be roughly the same age and feel a pang of emptiness. I would feel guilt for the abortion I had planned and then gratitude that I never had to know definitively whether I would have gone through with it.
The point is you will FEEL stuff. Allow yourself to feel it without guilt is the best advice I can give. I thought about it a lot less after the first couple of years but I still noted the year my child would have turned 18 and I still feel a weird emptiness and a pang in my stomach when I read something like this. It’s sad. A sad thing happened to you and I’m sorry. The hospital staff were awful with me as they knew I was planning an abortion so treated me horribly but there was a lady in the hospital with me at the time and what she said to me has stayed with me forever so I’ll say the same to you; You are so young, and you are so beautiful and your time will come when it’s the right time. xxx
"I get thousands of women speaking directly to me about how I’ve personally changed their life or altered their views in some way." I am one of them, thank you sharing again and again. sending you love, lea <3
I don't think I've ever felt so connected to someone else's experience. Your words resonate deeply with me, as I went through something very similar. From the generational trauma of a long line of young mothers to the desire to break that cycle and not pass on the pain to someone new, I understand it all. The difference is, I did go through with the abortion. Everything you described—the overwhelming guilt and relief—I felt it all too. It happened ten years ago for me, when I was 27. I don't regret the decision now; it was undoubtedly the right one. But I’d be lying if I said I never think about the unborn child. I even named it...how weird is that? Anyway, the pain you're feeling will subside with time. You're not alone in this. Thank you for sharing your story. 💜
the way i completely understood & deeply felt each emotion you wrote about in this, even if i didn’t relate to some.
as someone who has miscarried, it’s not talked about enough.
“ It felt shocking that this happens so often to women and I barely heard about it.” really spoke to me. thank you for sharing, genuinely. i’m wishing you some peace of mind, & i’m excited to see how your future unfolds.💗
That sounds incredibly complicated and stressful. I'm sorry you are going through this.
Your article has helped me to better understand the experiences of some of my closest friends and family. Thank you.
This was so beautiful
I’ve never felt so understood/ understanding. I truly wish u all the healing,happiness & peace the universe has to offer.❤️
I just read your substack. I had the exact same when I was 19 and in my second year at Uni. It took me right back to that. I was reading your words but seeing myself at the doctors and the hospital and on the toilet in our apartment as I miscarried and cried for the life I’d already decided wasnt going to be.
I honestly think the choice was taken from me because the universe knew it wasn’t the right time but didn’t want me to forever bear the weight of that decision. I imagine the same for you.
Mine was over 20 years ago. This next few months will be hard and tearful as your body deals with the hormones and physical loss and then your brain deals with the emotional cost. For the next few years I had a surreal kind of reaction. Not quite grief but a sad curiosity about what life would have been like. I would see children who would be roughly the same age and feel a pang of emptiness. I would feel guilt for the abortion I had planned and then gratitude that I never had to know definitively whether I would have gone through with it.
The point is you will FEEL stuff. Allow yourself to feel it without guilt is the best advice I can give. I thought about it a lot less after the first couple of years but I still noted the year my child would have turned 18 and I still feel a weird emptiness and a pang in my stomach when I read something like this. It’s sad. A sad thing happened to you and I’m sorry. The hospital staff were awful with me as they knew I was planning an abortion so treated me horribly but there was a lady in the hospital with me at the time and what she said to me has stayed with me forever so I’ll say the same to you; You are so young, and you are so beautiful and your time will come when it’s the right time. xxx
You seem like a retarded ahore